This Sunday we kept as Bible Sunday, and it was a particularly special Sunday for us as we were receiving the gift of a new lectern Bible from the Friends of Saint John’s. We already had a lectern Bible, but it has been largely unused for a long time since, like many churches, we now use the New Revised Standard Version in our worship. The new Bible we have is a beautiful leather-bound copy of the NRSV with Apocrypha.
For the occasion I chose as the gospel reading Luke 5.1-11 for reasons which will become clear. Here’s what I said.
Have you noticed how some things just don’t make sense?
- How do dads get away with buying presents for their children that they intend to play with themselves.
- Why do we press harder on a remote-control even when we know the battery is dead?
- Why do people go to Burger King and order a Double Whopper with large fries and then insist on having a Diet Coke?
- How come abbreviated is such a long word?
- Why do banks charge a fee on “insufficient funds” when they know you haven’t got the money to pay it?
- Why is there an ‘s’ in the word ‘lisp’?
- Why do people say that they slept like a baby? Do they mean they cried all night and kept their parents awake?
- Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to ashes and set fire to the kitchen?
- Why is the Bible the world’s best-selling book, and yet so few people seem to actually read it?